Good Conduct

A well-meaning mom wrote on her facebook wall that she was thankful to the PIT (Parent Involvement Team) for the good conduct field trip.  She was sharing publicly how thankful she was that good behavior is rewarded because, in her words, some children may not be capable of making all A's but EVERY child can sit down, be quiet and respect their elders. 

I am so glad that my mama taught me years ago to, as popular country song puts it, "hide my crazy and be a lady"!!!  I did not comment in that forum (I ran to my blog with just one follower instead).  I had to take a deep breath and remember that not too many years ago, I would have said the same thing.  Shoot, I probably would have been the PTI mama who headed up the drive to raise the money to take the "good" children on the fieldtrip!  In all seriousness, I mean no disrespect to the children who have someone in their life who has high expectations for them or even better, who strive to be obedient because they have been carried to church and understand fully that this is what Jesus and their parents expect.  They should be rewarded.  But what about the others.  What about the child who takes the safest does of medication allowed just to be able to focus but it wears off somewhere between lunch and 4th period and doesn't take effect again until 30 minutes after the lunch dose?  What about the little boy who is acting out because mom and dad fight all the time? What about the child who lives with secrets no child should ever have to live with.  What about the one who goes home to take care of themselves and maybe younger siblings because no one else cares enough about them to see that they even have clean clothes. 

I'm sorry but I respectfully disagree.  EVERY child can not sit down, be quiet and respect their elders.  Sadly these are most likely the same children who live with the shame of always falling short of everyone's expectations, like making all A's.  To SOME children, grades and conduct are the least of their worries, school is just a place to get a hot meal, somewhere relatively safe.  SOME children simply haven't been taught.  Then there is the one, like my little girl, who is just too full of spunk and sparkle, on the far end of ADHD, with parents at home who love her and do their very best to teach her to sit down, be quiet and respect her elders...the one that didn't get to go on the field trip but spent the day enjoying meeting the two very nice teachers she got to spend the day with...the one who couldn't understand why I was so upset because she didn't feel left out.  She liked the other teacher's room because it was  quiet:)