My Son

Twelve years ago God answered my earnest prayers. He gave me what I asked of Him, a beautiful little boy. Braden followed a miscarriage and is five and six years younger than his sisters. S-P-O-I-L-E-D!!! The "new" soon wore off for his sisters! He was just far enough behind them in age to be a major P-E-S-T!!! He is 5th in line of cousins on both sides of the family and not the first boy on either side. Although everyone loves him very much, he probably doesn't ever feel like he is anyone's favorite. Factor in two adopted younger siblings and the fact that he gave up his spot as youngest for that of the middle child. Since he was old enough to walk I think I have been sensitive to these things for him. I've prayed for a close boyhood pal and have been disappointed that just one doesn't really stand out. I think the main thing that I've longed for and prayed for him is that he would feel really special to someone.

My prayed for little boy is growing fast into a young man! In early August I took him to seventh grade orientation. As we were walking in I noticed a couple of boys standing alone on the walkway. They were the cool kids and they were peering at everyone that walked by. My heart ached a bit that he would probably never be accepted by them. They didn't speak and we walked on. Coming toward us was a grandmother with a boy about my son's age. The grandmother looked tired and unkempt and the young man walked a little further ahead with his head kept down low. Braden said in passing, "Hi, Criag". I stopped short as I watched the smile on that boy's face as he raised his head and said hello back. A few minutes later we went to meet his new teacher. This time a girl was sitting with her mother. I noticed immediately that she was very anxious. Again, my son said hello and called the young lady by name. A smile lit up a shy but pretty face. I can't count the people that my son spoke too that day. He did not see social class or beauty or coolness. He saw people.

I don't pray for him in the same way anymore. While I was praying for him to have a close friend, he was making friends with everyone. When my selfish mother's heart was worried about him feeling special to someone, he was using his boyish good looks and charm to make others feel that they mattered.

Christian's Prayer

This morning I was standing in the kitchen and Christian said, "Mama did you pray for Braden's football team?" I said, "No honey, I didn't pray for them today...but you can". He stopped what he was doing, dropped his little head and this is what he prayed, "Dear Lord, please help Braden's football team and let them win a game. Please be with Jana today when she takes her test. Please make Rosalee stop biting PawPaw in the head. Please help Braden's team win a trophy and I love you and thank you."

Braden's team may not win this year, but if there's a chance, I'll bet it's this Saturday! Rosalee is a HORSE!

Today is a pretty typical fall Saturday for our family. Jana is on her way back to college a little early for a play that the upperclassmen are putting on. Anna is headed south for a band competition (I'm soon to follow). Daddy is staying home with the little one until Braden's football game. Amberly gets to spend time with grandparents tonight and watch some Bama football. Christin is tagging along to his brother's football game because in his own words, "that's my brother" and he's hoping to sneak onto the sidelines. It's a juggling act every single day! I'm trying so hard to slow down and remember that "I'm gonna miss this"!

One day till grocery day MEAL!

I have four hungry mouths (not bad compared to our usual seven) to feed. It's 5:20 and for some reason I just didn't plan anything for dinner??? Mama said there would be days like this...I have in my cupboard various cans of veggies, one box of hamburger helper and rice. In the freezer I have two hamburger patties. Times like this is when I realize that we really house and grow piranha. If it's edible, it's gone. I browned the two hamburger patties, mixed in the hamburger helper and a drained a can of vegall. I cooked the rice and topped it with our cool beef and veggie blend. The little ones think they are eating gumbo and we'll have leftovers for lunch tomorrow.

Fall is in the air! As much as it can be in the deep south. Amberly and Christian have recently discovered "mud pies" and have spent the last two days outside literally playing in the dirt. A delightful break from their normal after school chaos. There are so many things to worry about but my sweet hubby reminded me this week of the words to one of his favorite songs, "Beautiful Boy"...Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans. These simple days are life.

Rhinestone Cowgirl

A little girl fell off of her horse. Though she tried, she couldn't overcome her fears...but then one Thanksgiving, the year she was ten and for no good reason, something clicked! She closed her eyes, swallowed her fears, went for a ride and NEVER looked back.

A secret

This is our family's "Year of Change". I came home full-time to take care of Christian and to be more available for all of the kids. With four of them diagnosed with asthma, I was home more than I could work anyway!!! The biggest change came this August when Jana left for college. She's not far away, less than 50 miles from the front door-steps! Still I can't understand why everyone says "that's not far". She's still not in her bedroom at night. I don't see her sweet face for days at a time. She might as well be a thousand miles away, because she's sure NOT here! I don't know how to describe how it feels exactly. We went to Disney this summer and by far the favorite ride was Splash Mountain. We rode it over and over. The beginning of the ride is curvy but you go at a leisurely pace. There are a few surprises as you wind around the familiar characters and listen to happy little tunes...for a moment you forget about the big "splash" that's coming. The scenes and the music seem to last forever but before you know it you are slowly ascending the incline and you KNOW that when you get to the top your body will drop but your stomach rise to catch in your throat. That's how it felt letting her go. I remember holding her in the hospital room like it was yesterday. Somehow feeling like I'd always known the shape of her nose, her hairline, her smell. You don't even know that the first time you hold them that you are already letting them go. I barely blinked and then I was sitting at her graduation. But there is a secret at this point in the journey. It's not earth shattering, I've never read about it. No one told me about it. It's just something that was a very sweet surprise. The story of the prodigal son alludes to it even though in this case she's not at all a "prodigal". Luke 15:20b..."but when he was still a great way off, his father saw him and had compassion, and ran and fell on his neck and kissed him." That's my secret, no one told me that on a regular Tuesday when my daughter calls and says, "Mama, I think I'm going to come home tonight, will you ride to Walmart with me"...that my world would be right. It's an anticipation unlike anything else I've ever experienced! Nothing compares to knowing that for a few hours tonight all that's mine and cherished will be within my reach.

A Beautiful Mind

I love to read blogs! I follow two or three for inspiration. I felt so inspired that I decided to start a blog (mostly because I couldn't find many families like ours to read about). I wrote two or three heartfelt posts and then...I LOST IT. I didn't loose the inspiration, didn't loose the motivation...I lost the BLOG!!! I couldn't remember how to get to it. Who does that??? I guess that's an insight into my "beautiful mind". A day or two ago I read on Facebook that my cousin decided to start her own blog to journal about her family. I jokingly commented that I had a blog but I lost it (sad face). It was very comical to me but in my heart I was cheering her on because, well...she's young. She WILL remember where she put her blog and she's much more technical savvy than I am. So today, I read her first blog post. I was moved to tears. I love it! Of course I had to comment. I wrote my sentimental comment and a window popped up for me to choose a "thingy"... I chose the "Google" link. I knew that at some point I must have done something online that required a password for Google. I entered my email and my old standby password and posted my comment. When I went back to her post to see if my comment had posted, I was delighted to see MY BLOG name! I FOUND IT!!! What fun to go back and read about my family a year ago. So much has happened in a year! Last April we finalized the adoption of our sweet little boy, Christian!!! He is playing happily in the floor beside me as I write. Our little girl is a very happy second grader and loves her teacher, her friends, gymnastics and violin. Braden is now a strapping twelve year old and right in the middle of football season. His daddy is his coach and his cousin, Nathan plays on the team too. Anna is enjoying her senior year and is BUSY, BUSY, BUSY!!! She is living her life out loud! Our oldest is away at college and I miss her EVERYDAY but she is blissfully happy and I love hearing about her adventures. Hopefully I will be able to remember where I put my blog tomorrow and the day after...